Make a New Plan Stan

May 4, 2009

I remember listening to Paul Simon when I was younger. Some songs I loved, but they seemed, frustratingly, to wander off the expected romantic track. "You're Kind" from Still Crazy is an example. It begins as an homage to a woman who came along at just the right time:

You’re kind
You’re so kind
You rescued me when I was blind
And you put me on your pillow
When I was on the wall
You’re kind

Things go on in this vein until the very end of the song:

So goodbye, goodbye
I’m gonna leave you now
And here’s the reason why
I like to sleep with the window open
And you keep the window closed
So goodbye

Huh? That's not right. This smooth transit between love and leaving occurs often in Simon's music. His more recent album You're the One has the song "Darling Lorraine." It is a lengthy tale, but comes down to the same quick goodbye:

Anyway Lorraine and I got married
And the usual marriage stuff
Then one day she says to me
From out of the blue
Frank, I’ve had enough
Romance is a heartbreaker
I’m not meant to be a homemaker
And I’m tired of being darling Lorraine

Then comes the incredulous response:

What - You don’t love me anymore?
What - You’re walking out the door?
What - You don’t like the way I chew?

This song wasn't around yet when I was young, but it would have perplexed me too. So that is what happens? Where is the big fight or the screaming?

From the beginning the end of relationships.. divorce.. has been a recurring subject. On his first eponymous solo album, after calling attention to the couples waiting in line in the courtrooms, he sings:

Love is not a game
Love is not a toy
Love's no romance
Love will do you in
And love will wash you out
And needless to say
You won't stand a chance, you won't stand a chance

Those first three lines have often come into my head over the years.. and have formed my understanding of love.

Even a classic Paul Simon song like "Graceland"—if you listen to the lyrics—is about the loss of a relationship.. and then seeking for grace and acceptance in the dread aftermath.

On a song from You're the One Simon sets out with total clarity the logic of human relationships:

Nature gives us shapeless shapes
Clouds and waves and flame
But human expectation
Is that love remains the same
And when it doesn’t
We point our fingers
And blame blame blame

Nature throws up shapes that evolve; Simon names three: clouds, waves, and flame. Each shifts constantly.. and that's what we expect from the natural world. But when we turn to the human world everything changes.. what perhaps we should see as a cloud we take for some concrete monument.. some beautiful eternal thing.